When the ongoing Astro-Kerfuffle brings two groups of opposing forces, one from the USS Enterprise, one from their assigned Star Destroyer, each comprising fifty members, into combat on the decks of the NSEA Protector...
You know what, no. The editor is protesting the continued existence of the Astro-Kerfuffle by refusing to write the normal style of description. I tried to kill this stupid thing more than a year ago, but the rest of you just won't let it go. I can't tell you how upset this makes me. Do you see what you've done? You've made me write this in first person! I never write episode descriptions in first person! Now I have to go weirdly meta with the whole thing, and it's all your fault!
Anyway.
When the Patrons of Smash Fiction demand a battle between history's most iconic space dumpuses, the hosts of Smash Fiction oblige. Not only do two of them argue that the red-shirted crew members of Star Trek's original series would survive in this match -- they argue that redshirts being especially death-prone is a full-blown myth, not supported by the text of the show! Not only do the other two argue that the Stormtroopers of Star Wars' original trilogy would survive in this match -- they argue that Stormtroopers being terrible at shooting is a full-blown myth, not supported by the text of the films! And thus did an entire sector of space become choked by the fog of shameless lies.
In this contest between those who can't kill and those who can't help but be killed, which team will have their accuracy praised by Obi-Wan Kenobi? Which team will be solemnly pronounced dead (Jim) by Dr. McCoy? And more importantly, which team will win the Lightning Round, and perhaps, if they're lucky, make the cover of OSQ?
It's time once again for Collaboratory, where four Smash Fic hosts attempt to cobble together a semi-coherent film using random characters and story elements!
This week, Claire is joined by Dan, Kit, and Liz, who have the unenviable task of attempting to craft a tale around a little girl, a cat, a dragon, and a serial killer, all while using elements from stories like Chronicles of Riddick, Jingle All the Way, and 1984. The hosts end up with a pile of really incongruous stuff, and end up making... something that actually kind of works? Listen and judge for yourself!
The Steve-ness is at an all-time high as Captain America (Steve Rogers) goes up against Steven Universe in one of the most wholesome matches Smash Fiction has ever done. These two Steves have each been tasked with training a group of upstart Power Rangers in the ways of teamwork and Steve-itude. In this match where normally you would find shouting, instead there are admiring sighs. Where normally there would be epithets, instead there are declarations of affection. Where normally you would find character with different names, you will find Steves.
Which shield-wielding Steve will save the day? Miles and MeganBob argue that age, experience, and beardliness are Steve Rogers' keys to victory. Claire and special guest Sharon Schneiderman argue that Steven Universe always finds a way. Dan presents the most Steve-ful Lightning Round yet! Listen in and unleash your inner Steve.
This episode originally aired as the Patreon bonus episode for December 2018. The original description follows:
Those of you $5+ patrons who get our monthly bonus content poll must have been surprised when Miles gave you a list of media he liked... and one of them was a video game! That's right, Miles is (briefly) putting aside his role as everyone's favorite curmudgeon to gush about the 2004 computer role-playing game Vampire: The Masquerade - Bloodlines. He's joined by Dan, who has played the game, and Kit, who has not, and the three hosts have fun chatting about the video game, the tabletop RPG, and the wonderful, terrible World of Darkness as a whole.
There are some light spoilers for Bloodlines in this episode, but if you're interested in playing the game, our discussion should hopefully only whet your appetite for a genuinely great, if not perfect, cult classic of a game. Let us know what you think!
Now that they've gathered the information they need, the League sets their sights on their newest target: the Praetor known as Godzilla. Our heroes are hoping to find him, cure him, and turn him, but that is all easier said than done, as they'll have to traverse a vast and nightmarish forest, deal with shadowy monsters, and unlock a strange power that's been hiding in them all along...
Luna makes yet another new friend; Dante leaps to the rescue; Stitch becomes a meteor; Nico shows off her new skills; and Mordin dives into the belly of the beast.
Thanks again to Family Jules for both of the battle songs used in this episode! Check out more of his work at youtube.com/user/FamilyJules7X